Like you, I have a story to share and lessons that can potentially help on your journey through life. 

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I am a father to 4 beautiful kids, from 2 past relationships. 

I started working in the construction industry when my son was born 17 years ago. It was a job that offered security financially for my family. This became a passion and eventually I began my own steel fixing company, which for some time was very successful. Unforeseen circumstances unfortunately lead to the closing of my company. Since then I have been working as a manager and steel fixer on numerous job sites, as well as being faced with intense challenges like many of us have, or are currently. All while navigating my way through life trying to balance work, my kids, sport at times and my passions which include writing.

 

My Story
 

Born in Sydney NSW, I grew up in Shoalhaven Heads on the South coast, 2 hours south of Sydney.

As a child I was pretty shy and rarely found myself in trouble. I never liked conflict and tried to avoid it wherever I could. However I did struggle with anger as I grew into a young man.  A lot of this stemming from the issues and conflicts of my parents in my younger years. I struggled with these ‘at home’ issues and did not cope very well. This unfortunately affected my schooling, my senior years were the toughest, failing my year 12 High School Certificate. You would often find me detached from the world, staring out the window in class. My mind became 'foggy' most of the time.

 

Although I had great friends at school, football enabled me to focus on a potential future, a chance of something more and an opportunity to vent my frustrations and anger. Rugby League was my escape and release, providing a focus for my mind and body. I played for NSW combined high schools open team in '89' and we were undefeated while on an 18 day tour of Queensland, winning the Australian Championships. Unfortunately, I perforated my eardrum against the Northern Territory before the final.
 

I played for Parramatta Eels in 1989 to 1991. During this time, I found a mentor through a footy mate, to support me with some emotional challenges I had been experiencing, past and present. He helped me to focus my mind further and offered some new insights through his own experiences. This was what motivated me to complete a diploma in clinical hypnosis in 1991, at the age of 20.
 

I practised performance enhancing hypnosis and techniques on myself and others from 1991 to 1993 on the central coast and in 1995 in Perth, with profound effects.
 

Throughout my career in Rugby League, physical injuries became my greatest obstacle and hindered my ability to follow opportunities at the time. Football had served its purpose for a while, filling a gap in my life. I became disheartened toward the end and began searching for something more.
 

I discovered meditation and healing techniques while in Perth in my 20's and had my first major inspiration on a trip to Denmark WA in 1999 with my then spiritual teacher.
 

I went to see the American Guru by the name of Gangaji. She was so beautiful, so full of love. When She was first introduced and I saw her for the first time, something ignited within. I remember thinking, "I want to be just like that".

 

A few years later I travelled to India, where I met Shantimayi and Amitabha who embraced me with their profound love and open hearts. I decided to follow their ways. Embarking on a journey of discovering and learning from their teachings. 

 

Some say 'we do not need a Guru' and 'you are your own Guru' and yes while that may be true. They touched my life like no one else had. 

 

I remember sitting in the Great Maharaji's temple in his Ashram in Luxhman Jhulla. Having my first experience of Satsang in India with ShantiMayi. My mind from ShantiMayi's first word was cursing everything around me and every word she was saying. I remember thinking wow, my mind is insane! (bare in mind I very rarely swear). It was the first time I had been that silent, or not so distracted or preoccupied ever! But instead of running away I felt an underlying sense that, this was exactly where I was meant to be. It was exactly what I needed. I stayed there for nearly 3 months. 

 

I very often say, 'only understanding will set us free', this understanding is only ever found in our heart, in love. To continually suffer, you must continually remind yourself that you are suffering, living that pain and "YOUR REASONING'S FOR IT" over and over, whether it's a person you blame, a circumstance, or an accident, or even yourself. If you don't remind yourself of the reasoning's for your suffering you naturally become distracted and forget. As soon as you realise, you think, were was I? Oh that's right, I'm meant to be suffering and off you go again. Sounds crazy right? But that's what so many people do. You deserve so much more!

 

Protecting your pain and your reasoning for it makes no sense at all. It's like we hold onto it thinking it gives us some form of attention, value or some false sense of power. Here's another insane definition for you which has been said before; Resentment is like taking poison yourself and expecting another to suffer! If you are not interested in seeing through your thoughts, your suffering and your reasoning for it, then you are simply harbouring and protecting your ideas or belief's that are destroying you.

 

The great news is, "YOU" can absolutely be free from your 'suffering mind'. Slowly slowly at first but with proper practice, it becomes easier. You alone are responsible for your thoughts, feelings and actions. Gaining control of these aspects is the path to your ultimate freedom.

 

In reference to this. There are times when I felt really down about who I thought I was, while in India, at times I could not stand me. In those moments I felt such profound love from my Guru's. Over time, that love melted my walls away. I felt within me, to my core that they must be right and I must be wrong. I 'DID NOT' try to protect my self defeating feelings of self loathing, not even for one second. I knew that they could see and that I could not. I had to discover what they saw. I had to discover how to see like that. I had to find a way.

 

Life continued to challenge me in so many ways, as well as my "arm-wrestling mind", more than I could have possibly imagined and so much more than I felt I could have withstood. To the very brink. 

 

But then, my deepest wish was fulfilled and I tasted my heart for the very first time in 2012 and my book ensued. Some of my experiences, discoveries, insights and more are aspects (also in my book) I will explore in depth, but also with respect to my writings, videos and live streams. Life still brings challenges, however I have learned to allow these challenges and events to unfold naturally while I do what I can from a centred perspective. This does not mean I am a 'door mat'. I still stand up for what I feel is right. But the endless cycle of 'to-ing and fro-ing' or endless cycle of reacting to others cease. True deep profound understanding and reflecting are the keys to unlocking all doors, the key to freedom. This is the way forward.
 

Life goes on, we offer what we can and our ability to be open-minded is a strength available to all. 

 

The way forward is through heart, love and softness. I invite you to take this journey into self-discovery with me. 

 

For more in depth insight and challenges on these principles mentioned, please enjoy my book!